Paula, ACCORD SUD Counselor, finds purpose in her career. *December 2023.
SAN DIEGO – Paula is an SUD (substance use disorder) Counselor at ECS’ ACCORD DUI Treatment Program. Although she has worked in the SUD field for 28 years, Paula is no stranger to addiction. She struggled with a substance use disorder for many years. The challenges her clients deal with are often challenges she faced in the past. And it’s her lived experience that makes her such a compassionate counselor.
“I did things that I would have never imagined. Who am I to judge anybody that sits here [at ACCORD]? Cause what I do know is that everybody who sits here is good people. You made a bad choice, right? So, give yourself some grace because God gives us grace all the time. And that’s why I do what I do,” Niemeyer explained.
The way she treats her clients reflects this mindset.
“I don’t ever come to work and tell my people, ‘You need to stop drinking…’ and ‘don’t do that’ cause I had that. I had people pointing a finger at me and telling me what a shame I was all the time. I don’t do that.”
Paula grew up in what she described as an alcoholic and violent family setting, which made it difficult to be trusting and comfortable. This environment was also a factor in her struggle with substance abuse.
“I started using my own mother’s Valium… I found out that when she would hit me, they were just like little slaps, and so I could take it, right? And so, it didn’t matter, so I would steal the Valiums, I would take them, and I knew when I would come home if she beat me, she beat me,” Paula said. “The drug covered up the emotional feeling.”
At 18, Paula left home and met her husband shortly after. She got pregnant and then gave birth to a daughter who passed away at the tender age of only 88 days. This event would be the catalyst that sparked her heroin addiction.
“I needed something that numbed that,” Paula said, pointing to her head, “and numbed this,” pointing to her heart.
Perhaps by God’s design, seven years later to the exact day that her first daughter was born, Paula gave birth to her son. “The whole night, I just watched him – the whole night. I was just so scared,” she said.
Even after the birth of her son, Paula still struggled to break free from addiction. She described the moment everything became clear for her as an “out-of-body experience.”
“I can see myself sitting at this table, literally, like I can see, looking down, I can see the table and myself sitting there. And it was like two movies that went frame by frame,” she explained.
She gestured to one side of her head. “This one here, I could see myself being led back into CIW (California Institution for Women), which is a prison. I could see the tower, the gate,” she said. Then, gesturing to the other side, “This one here, I can see a casket and a man, and to me, it was a funeral. The only person there was the man that was performing the service. And I felt like God was saying ‘Take your pick. Which one do you want, Paula?’ That’s a tough pick, which one do you pick? I didn’t want either one. So, I don’t know how much time went by… I just know when I came back into my body, I said, excuse my French, I said ‘[expletive] this, I can’t do this no more.’ And I called Narcotics Anonymous.”
Paula with her grandchildren. *December 2023.
Today, Paula is 30 years sober, and her son is a Chief in the Navy. Paula also has three grandchildren, whose pictures hang proudly in her office. “Wherever they may go, I will follow,” she said of her family. “That’s what I got in my life.”
Paula cut ties with her parents and siblings, but in losing that family she gained another. “I remember when I got clean, my sponsor asked me to write a list of everything I wanted God to give me. I remember the first thing on there was my family,” Paula said. She found unconditional love in the family she built.
Paula draws from her challenges, experiences, and growth to help teach her clients and extend much-needed empathy to them.
Paula feels love and acceptance from her family. *December 2023.
She stated, “I know everything that I experienced in my life brought me to where I am today, made me who I am today.”
The decision to stay in the SUD field was not always easy for Paula. But her trust in God continually guided her on the right path.
“I remember I was 40 years old sitting at my desk… and it was just like God was talking to me. And I said, ‘Why? Why am I here? Why do you have me in this place?’” Paula said. “And it was like God was talking to me like I’m talking to you right now. He said, ‘Paula, you’re here because you’re supposed to help people. And if you help one person, you’ve done your job.’”
Paula recalled that even when she left the SUD field to pursue a different job, “God would say, ‘Oh, no Paula, I need you over here.’ And he’d take me, and he’d drop me back off somewhere else.” Now, she is certain that SUD counseling is her true calling.
In 2021, Paula joined the team at ECS ACCORD and said she has felt very welcomed and supported in the organization. She continues to feel passionate about her work, even after so many years. She described seeing lives change through the program as her “emotional paycheck.”
“When a person comes into residential treatment, they come in like a very dried up, withered weed,” Paula said. “They come in, you nurture them, you give them support, you water them, and then when they leave, they turn out to be this very beautiful bouquet as they exit the door. That’s what I like to see.”
Paula’s dedication and knowledge helps shape lives every day, and as long as she follows God’s plan, she won’t be retiring any time soon.
ECS ACCORD is a state licensed DUI Treatment Program supporting individuals with DUI offenses, offering educational classes on substance abuse effects, and group and individual counseling sessions in a confidential environment. Its goal is to reduce DUI incidents and mitigate their impact on individuals, families, and the community. Approximately 95% of clients state their experience at ACCORD has positively impacted their lives.
*Caption dates may not be exact.
